Being 30

Actually it was yesterday, but we all were busy, coz there was a wedding in this campus. But, this birthday seems so special, now I turn to 30!! (I'm an Indonesian so to be old is an advantage here). There are some target that I have to achieve, and there were some targets I already achieved. Time goes on, I can't go back to my life like I was 17 or 20 or 25. If I can survive till today, I believe that is only because of my God. Thank you Lord for everything... and for the special gift that You've been giving for me these years.

Norman's prayer

One time I hurt my toe at the door.. It was extremely hurt and made me shout "ouch!!!!" And I started to say in Bahasa "aduuh sakit, sakit ..." - which is means "ouch, it's hurt" - several times. I didn't notice that Norman was there and looking at me. Suddenly he began to speak and touched my feet with his little hand and said "Tuhan Yesus, tolong papi..sakit..amen" - Lord Jesus, help papi/daddy.. hurt..amen". I knew he made a mistake by saying "papi" not "mami", but I realized that is because everytime Eka (my husband) gone for ministry I always ask him to pray for his dad. But at that time, it was his very first time to pray by himself.. and he prayed for me!!!! he was 2,7 years old...
The pain I felt was disapeared.. What I felt was changed into a wonderful joy which made my tears came down. In the very young age, he knows that there's a time when God is the only solution. Sometimes we need to be as pure as Norman, no need to think how, why, when, where... but just pray.

Come Again

It's been a while I haven't post a thing in this blog. Too many disturbances in this web thing. It seems like my mood of blogging is depended on my interest and busyness as well.
These are those things:
On May 5th, we did have womens meeting for all pastors' wifes, women pastors, and single women ministers.
After that I was busy with my handcrafts (made some flowers and some cute bottles), preparing for graduation that had been done last Friday. Too bad I forgot to take pictures of them, and those are sold already.
Graduation of course...
Today, we just had the first session of TESL, which is I really need it because I like to teach English and I would like to make my people (Indonesians) to become better learners of English stuff. Because, you know, only few of Indonesians that like to learn English and mostly in big cities. The second session will be in this Monday.
Also, these months I have opened a new facebook account and another blog for my pictures in aminus3.
Hope that I can finish all things well...

Do You Know??

I just found this interesting fact about Bible in YHS Ministry in its website. You might like to know or find out if this thought is right.

Do you know that:

- Psalm 118 is the most middle passage in the Bible?

- Psalm 117, before 118 is the shortest passage in the Bible?

- Psalm 119, after 118 is the longest passage in the Bible?

- The Bible has 594 passages before Psalm 118, and 594 passages after Psalm 118?

- If you count all passage in the Bible, except Psalm 118 the amount will be 1188 passages?

- 1188 or Psalm 118:8 is the most middle verse in the Bible?

- Does Psalm 118:8 have an important message?

"It is better to take refuge in the LORD than to trust in man"
Psalm 118:8

Begins to Differentiate

Norman is almost 27 months old this March. He completely knows when is bathroom times. In fact, he's not using diaper in night time for a month! I've bought a turtle with shapes since he was 18 months old. Recently, I bought him a train with shapes.

After I bought it, he could not use it properly. He just dropped all shape in the same hole and sometimes he didn't want to play with it. I thought it was useless to buy such toys for Norman. But these weeks, he's showed a progression and began to put those shapes in its holes. Now he knows which one is star, heart, circle, triangle, rectangle, flower, letter 'B' and 'A'.

It is an excited moments for me to see his progression in thinking and learning.

Mission Day in Satyabhakti Advanced School, March 7th 2008

This is an annual event in our Bible School. Many young people comes from places around east Java. Some of them are not believers. Some of them will surrender their life and become new students in this Bible School.
Here are some pictures, you can see how God uses and touches many young people to spread His word and love.

Norman is coloring

I've bought several coloring books for him, but they were only survived for a day. So I've got this idea. I collected pictures from google and put them in Microsoft Word and make a simple coloring book for Norman. When he received it, he was very happy. He sat on his chair and try to color it each page in his new book. Now I don't have to buy again. I just go to the office and make the copy of those pictures (xerox them, because I don't have this in my house), cut those papers become two parts, make a hard cover from another paper, stapler and ta daa..... it becomes a cute simple and very cheap coloring book. If you want to have it, you can download this file at Norman's Coloring book.

It's been proven!!

When they see our faces, they always say that Norman very much looks like me. But I say no. For me, he looks very much like his dad except his hair and skin. Now, I'm trying this website to see who has the right answer of Norman's face.

In the middle of unable...

Trying to be strong, but it's not as easy as I think. Trying to be cheerful everyday, so that people won't know that I'm struggling inside. I'm doing my best, just like the Bible has said. But still, I feel so tired to continue. How can I move on with such problem? What I want to do now, is just stop and go to bed and pretend that I'm the only person in this world who trying to relax and imagine many things and dream about good things (of course this will not happen, with one 2 years old baby in your house, which very depend on you!).
I stand in my door right under my star fruit tree, my eyes are looking outside and starting to sing in my heart some songs that can encouragement my soul. And I begin to talk with God:
"Lord, I don't want this thing stop, because I know it will not happen. What I want from you now, is give me a new heart. A heart that can thankful for everything, a heart that helps me to have a positive perspective about life, a heart that never give up from challenge, a heart that make me closer everyday to you, a heart that can please Your heart as well... Thank you Lord"

Craft Vase

I love to design something from something. I cannot stew or stitch (it a little bit to late for me to practice my finger), bake (I'm not patient enough to make nor to wait a cake), painting (gosh! this one really need a special skill), garden (hehe.. :"D you can ask my friends about this, they really know me for this one). But I do love crafting!! I can sit for hours or a day only to create something from bottle, jar, ice cream stick, paper or anything and change them to become something cute and pretty.

This is one of my designs. I use a plastic jar for the vase, and cover it with paper and put small things to make it prettier and put pinecones as its ring at the bottom.

Save Your Money

I am not talking about saving money in the bank. But it is about better to cook by yourself than you buy from somewhere. For the first time it was hard for me, because I am not a good cook (even now, compare to my friends in this campus) and since I was single one of my hobbies is eating in other places such as restaurant or food courts, etc. Now, I am trying to be changed. The result is pleasing me so much and also my family. Though I cook very simple food (typical Indonesian home food), I enjoy it. What I have to deal now is no more time to relax, especially in the morning because I don't have a helper. I don't know why, it is very hard to have the same helper for more than 1 month. I did have 2 years ago and also 2 month ago, but they quit without reason. Such thing is happened many times here.
Anyway, I just want to suggest you to cook by yourself, instead of buying food from the outside.

Nanny 911

I like this TV show. It is one of the healthy TV shows that you need to watch. I don't have to tell you about it, because I'm sure that you have known it already. It is amazing to see how those nannies can solve huge problem in a family, though we may be discouraged to believe that they can help such family.
What I want to share is about the problem of every family, both the parents and the children. I think most of those families have the same problems: discipline (for children), consistent and firm (for parents). These principles cannot be separated. You cannot discipline a child if you are not a firm parent. You cannot achieve the result if you are not consistent in putting the boundaries.
I know that this is not as easy as it looks. But, we have to put the boundaries from now.
I remember one time my friend told me about her c lass. She was taking class and it was about family. The professor told them about raising a kid. He said that when we raise a child we need to see them in the future. It can help us as parents in helping them to be someone for the future.

Hobby

We just have a new camera, because the old one has a problem. Instead of fix it, we decide to buy a new one. It is Canon s5IS camera. It is a good camera. I like to have it because one of my hobbies is taking pictures. I really enjoy to take a lot of pictures. I'm glad that now we live in high technology which is we can use digital camera. The advantage of digital camera is you can take pictures as much as you want and you can delete it right away if you don't like it.



Talking about camera, I really like my new camera. I always take pictures since we bought it. My permanent object is Norman for sure and Skipler, my dog. Sometimes I go outside and take pictures from nature such as, flowers, stones, bugs, cloud, etc. While I was taking pictures many people in the campus think that I was silly because I stood in the middle of a field, behind the bush, sit on the road, while the sun was so hot. Nevertheless, I love taking pictures. It is good for our soul to demonstrate our hobby as long as it is positive.

Just wanna say...

Our campus' had Christmas on Nov 30th. I know that was too early for Christmas time. It was because this campus was thinking about the students, so that they could go home and have their vacation earlier . I've been lonely since Dec 1st. My husband went to Ambon for teaching a block course for a week. He will be coming this Saturday. Thank God there is a student who wants to stay with me while she is working for her thesis(until Friday). Anyway, I enjoy my time with my little boy though. He becomes my best friend when his daddy away from me. He understands that in the house only both of us, he shows a good behave to me. He helps me to feel better for being alone these days. Thank you so much my dear.. Mommy loves you so much..!!

Thank You...

Today is our anniversary. I thank God because He's been helping us for 4 years. Our marriage is still to young. But I can see how God's helped us through these years.

Dear Eka,
I love you for what you are, but I love you
yet more what you are going to be.
I love you not so much for your realities
as for your ideals.
I pray for your desires that they may be great,
rather than for your satisfactions,
which may be so hazardously little.
You are going forward toward something great.
I am on the way with you,
and therefore I love you.

--Carl Sandburg

Through It All...

Today I've been having a great day. Since early in the morning, my students (a whole 2nd year class) came and sang "Happy B'day" in front of my house. Surely, I was surprised though I was so happy and touched by their action. And other people continue to say the same words. I didn't celebrate my birthday this year. I only went with my husband and had lunch, not in a romantic restaurant, but in KFC!!! Amazing, wasn't?? I miss KFC for a very long time, therefore I chose it as a place to celebrate my birthday. At the same time, I've been thinking about my life. I realize that somehow God helps me to pass this year. Actually not only this year but every year in my life. I can through it that's only because of Him. Like what Darlene Zschech's song, Through It All:

You are forever in my life
You see me through the seasons
Cover me with your hands
And lead me in your righteousness
And I look to you and
And I wait on you...

Chorus:
I'll sing to you Lord a hymn of love
For your faithfulness to me
And Im carried in everlasting arms
Youll never let me go through it all

Hallelujah...

Hallelujah...

Hallelujah...

Hallelujah...

Thank you Lord, for being faithful in my entire life... Thank you for helping me in every circumstances that I might be failed if You're not with me... Thank you Lord

Forgiveness

As we know that children can forgive people easily. I can use Norman as an perfect example. He won't keep his angry less than 2 minutes, though he'll scream or throw something if I don't give what he wants. But after that... he's stop and continue to play, it seemed like nothing happened.
But how about us?? Forgiveness is easy to speak, to teach and to preach but actually it does really hard to do it. I've through this many many times in my life, and I know that it's not only me who's been struggled with this. I believe that many people have the same problems.
Tonight, while I'm trying to sleep, I remember how God has forgiven me again, again and again, for what I've done. Why does He forgive me?? I believe that God knows if forgiveness is a hard part for us to do it. If He does it that because He has a reason. In the Bible, He's explained this many times. Forgiveness is not an option, but we need it. I remember how struggled I was to forgive people that whether they did it intentionally or not. But after I forgave and passed it, now I know why God teaches us to forgive and why we have to forgive.

First of all, forgiveness is come from inside you, you are the one that can decide to take away or keep it away. Even though you ask pastors to pray for you, but you are the key.

Forgiveness is a way to except someone by the way he is. We can't expect people to being perfect. Each person has weaknesses and we have to deal with it.

Forgiveness is helping us to continue our life. May be you feel hurt, but such feeling will not make your life stopped. You still have to do your work or job or responsibilities and taking care of your family and friends.

Forgiveness can make your soul more healthy.

Forgiveness can train you to be a tough and strong person. You can face various people in the world and work anywhere because you are used to forgive.

Forgiveness helps you to have a lot of friends.

Forgiveness is training your trust to someone that might be isn't worthed to be trusted.

Forgiveness can color your life to become more beautiful then what you think.

And Most of All, you have to forgive because forgive and love are walking together like what Jesus has been done. He forgives us because He loves us. If you cannot forgive, maybe you need to ask God to give you more love than you have before.

Jesus Bless You...

Thankful

This morning I went to the church and have been blessed by both the song and the sermon. We sang a song about how God helps us in every single time in our life, and without Him we can do nothing.

I look at Your face and cry out,
My help is only from You
Hold my hand and never let me go
Because You are God my savior

This song reminds me personally that only God can help me in every circumstances of my life, whether I am happy, sad, rich, poor, healthy, sick, certain, doubtful, disappointed, etc. The sermon itself is about "Thankful". Both the song and the sermon are somehow connected. My heart was broken when we were singing this song. Through this songs it seems that God is talking to me, that actually I can't face this world or every day with my own strength. If I can stand right now, that's only because He is standing next to me and holding my hand. Every morning that He gives is because His mercy and grace to me. I can have a beautiful son and great husband also because His mercy and grace.
Therefore, I just wanna say to my beloved God: "Thank you so much for helping me every time I need. May be I can forget You because of my weaknesses, but I now that You will never forget me and You will still there wait and open Your arms to hold and hug me. You are the God that give me strength and wonderful life."

Be Patient...

Norman now is 22 months. His vocabulary improving a lot and he can express what he feels more than before. I can see that he is much growing and bigger, in fact, I can call him a boy now, not a baby. It feels very good to see our kid growing like this.
What I want to share now is about Norman and his "bathroom" time. These days I feel so happy and proud to be a mom, because eventually Norman can tell me if he wants to go to bathroom, even while we are in walking time in our campus. I remember how frustrated I was when everyday he did his "bathroom" everywhere in our house even though I'd told him not to do so. Sometimes he wore diaper but mostly he didn't, except if we were going somewhere. I once thought that maybe he could does his bathroom when he is three but now he is still 22 months!! He's not even 1 year and he already do it!! I am surprised, for sure. When first time he said that he wanted to go to bathroom I almost jump. We quickly ran into the bathroom. After he did it, I hugged him and kissed him and gave him positive words that he is an excellent boy in the world!! It was an amazing time for me. Through that moment I can learn something that maybe I feel fail to teach him or got frustrated, but actually I just need sometimes and be patient to see the result of my teaching.

Quality Time

It's been more than a month I am not posting my blog. Now I have more activity beside parenting. My school, where I live in, ask me to teach English class. Finally, I accept their request. It's only once a week, every Tuesday in the morning for 2 hours. Before, I always refuse because of Norman. I couldn't leave him, he's still to young for me at the time therefore I make him as a priority.
He is growing now and of course, can talk and express what he wants or feels. Also, I can leave him for around 2-3 hours to someone else without feeling worry. Now my challenge is how to make a quality time for him in this age. Norman is 20 months, so almost 2. This is time for him to learn about many things. He likes imitating words and act. For me this age is a crucial age to put a basic for him. I teach him how to pray, love books, know what to do and not, time to sleep and play, etc. Even though I have another responsibility but Norman is still a priority.
I've noticed that I become more understand Norman. It's good for both of us, especially me. He really love to play. He always says "more" in Bahasa if he likes it and in the middle of his mom and dad on the bed. Sometimes he falls a sleep while we are talking in the bedroom. I can see how he feels comfortable if his parents are around him. I want to use this time before it's gone. Before I realize, he will be changed and become a boy and then a teenage and everything will not be the same.